how do you want me to love you?

Whilst walking towards prata house, i had a severe pain in my heart. It's when my chest started to tighten and my heart had this pain struck by some sort pause. Right there and then, i realized, i needed to cry. But how could i? I was walking from one traffic light to another. Sweet misery had to give me a fall in reality.
1. There is obviously something wrong in the relationship
2. So many people are trying to come inbetween.
3. Friends don't act like friends.
4. Friends and drama.
5. New school.
6. Frustrated and rather complicated me.

I just thought i had this all figured out. But no, i can NEVER Ever figure it out.

You'll never know true love till you get burned.
I could say it a hundred times over and think about it for the rest of my days but i am certain i can never quite accept it as a feeling i have to sit through.
It's like feeling hungry yet not having the appetite to consume and feeling sad but the eyes give no room for tears. Everything in front of me is just the exact opposite of how i may be feeling. Because till this very moment, i still cannot comprehend the true meaning of the emotions i have inside of me. I am everything you can ever think of all at once.

Capable of true love yet lost in an irony of lament.
(from amanda sue ann)

so then love, how do you want me to love you?