Tuesday, September 05, 2006

When all is said and done, i'll fall flat on the ground

i am a WRECK.
I don't know what i did wrong. I really don't. Everything has been crushed down right before my eyes, and now i wish i can throw away every memory i have.
I gave up everything i had, i gave you part of my world in return, i gave you me. Every single inch of me.
At the end of the 3 months, i hope you would wipe every memory of me, forget me is it simple?
I know i won't. I'll be haunted by the roof-top everytime i go up to scream or to cry, i know i'll cry even more.


{edited} and cont'd.

My emotions, the private ones.

Let me pour it all out this once and i'll be done alright readers?
This will be the last page of our story and it ends here.
It ends however,with a heartbreak, and it's mine.
It ends with sheds of tears and unthinkable pain.
How mother fucking weak and what a fucking lair am i to myself when i say this love ends here though.
Am i living that lie i have always thought i was in?
Am i really that strong or was it all just a mask behind those teary eyes?
I thought all that we shared was against all odds.

But why did this have to happen?
Why isn't anyone letting me in anymore?
i can't think straight. My mind is a muddy whirlpool.
You've let me trip into the deep pithole too fast that i can't get out anymore.
I don't even know who i am no more.
I've lost it all.
I'm officially a wreck.
Tell me who do i turn to now in times of trouble, in times of utter pain?
Is it you who will wipe away my tears and be my shoulder to cry on still or is it simply just hte other way round?
I feel myself struggling to breathe but i;m just staying afloat for as long as my mind and my heart tells me too. So much about willingness and determination.

It ceases to pay off. I've been mortified greatly.

I'm running around trying to pick up the pieces you've lefet behind and hurry rekindle them. It's exhuasting. Im an idiot.

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